debutch's current selection is:
"I Walk On Gilded Splinters"
by Cher
#SaturdayStoryTime
#Anotherdebutchtale

****** " My neighbour…. Cher!!" ******** ( Sounds just ludicrous but 100% true!.................)

( From TIMJ August 2015 )


During the 10 years (’86-’96) when I lived in Wapping East London, I spotted several stars ambling around my neighbourhood like Morrissey , George Michael , Frank Bruno , Brian May , Chris Evans & Martin Clunes but the biggest celeb of them all ( in status ) just had to be Cher. And she wasn’t just passing through either. She lived in my neighbourhood!
A few of those people I mentioned lived in the wealthy strip of Wapping, NOT where I lived. Ha! (even though I lived only 5 minutes’ walk away) No , they occupied the converted warehouses that overlooked the River Thames & The Tower of London.
Wapping was like an off-the-road little village right in the heart of London with the Thames on one side as a barrier and “The Highway” main road as the other barrier creating this isolated, cosy secluded area I called my home.


SO…One day (around 1990) , I was walking home by the canal when I spotted this woman in front of me with glossy white hair and she was rollerblading. She seemed awkward & unsteady as she wobbled along as two strapping guys kept hurrying along to help her keep balance. All three of them were wearing shades and as I said, I was used to seeing celebs in my neighbourhood so I guessed that this was another one & quickly ran to overtake her.
I surreptitiously slid onto a bench facing the canal and of course her too as she now approached me.
She then actually stopped very close to me to adjust her blades and she took off her shades to do it……...” OMG!!!” I thought “It’s Cher!!” …...” It’s actually her” ……...

Blades fixed & shades back on, she slowly rolled inches past me & then suddenly turned right from Spirit Quay to head towards the Thames and she was heading straight towards my house.
My house was on a corner with a slope next to some steps and she was obviously heading straight for that. She was picking up a bit of speed now and then another dramatic wobble occurred and for ONE split second, I actually thought she was going to smash into my street door!
( I had this surreal image of my wife opening our door at that exact precise moment only to find superstar Cher come flying head-first into our home…….just another everyday occurrence!…)
But sadly no…. regaining control, she skipped past our door & headed for the Thames.

I ran as fast as I could to my house so my wife could catch a glimpse of her. “What IS it??” she squealed. (I’m doubled up, gasping & unable to speak) ….”CHER” pant pant pant…..” with a platinum wig” gasp gasp, wheeze……”on wheels outside”…..but she was gone.
I can’t remember the exact words my wife used but it had the effect of “ There there, you’ve been having hallucinations again, haven’t you? Go & have a lie down, eh?”
ALL of my friends thought I imagined it or made a mistake & I sulked for DAYS over that!

A couple of weeks later after I had (almost) forgotten about it, I was watching the Clive Anderson show on TV & he was interviewing his special guest who just happened to be………. Cher!
What I heard next had me awestruck. I sat there listening to the interview within my mouth open as I heard this……
CLIVE; ….”SO, it appears you’ve now become a London resident but I HAVE to ask you this. You are a Hollywood A-list movie star & singer. You could live in Mayfair, Knightsbridge, ANYWHERE really, so what on EARTH made you choose Wapping of all places?”
CHER….” I am just tired of living amongst all things superficial. I just want to be surrounded by real honest working people. Outsiders very rarely go through Wapping. It’s only Wapping people there. I want to go to the local grocery shops. I want to go to the pub & have a beer by the river. I want to go to the local park & around my neighbourhood on my rollerblades” ……..It was at THAT point I began stabbing my finger furiously at the TV yelling “ SEE??” SEE???” while leaping up & down like a lunatic child waiting to be sent to the naughty step….

(I moved out of Wapping 21 years ago but even today, you can still find the likes of Helen Mirren, Graham Norton & Lady Gaga living there…)
1969 - Atco
Posted: 15th April 2017
40
plays
39
likes
 
Nothing currently playing...
Likes
Archive
All debutch's selections:
First
68 likes
24 Apr 2017
First
54 likes
22 - 24 Apr 2017
With 1 other
48 likes
19 - 22 Apr 2017
First
37 likes
17 - 19 Apr 2017